I graduated from Grove City last weekend. Woohoo!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=grlylEdbz8Y

I Love ABT.

I learned something this week: there’s a fine line between being a sociologist and being a stalker.

Before I explain, I must make a few clarifications:

1. I believe I was being a sociologist

2. I don’t believe it counts as stalking if the one being observed is a friend

3. I wasn’t really a true sociologist because I was not an entirely objective observer

4. #3 makes #1 false, but I’m not taking it off. Maybe instead it should say, I definitely wasn’t being a stalker.

So here’s the situation. I have recently become friends with a young man here at Grove City. I’ll call him Jeff. Earlier this week, I overheard him talking with a friend about something called Operation Phi Beta Gamma. The mission included such phrases as “target engaged,” “we be bringin’ da house,” “WHO DEY! WHO DEY!” and “can a brother can an amen?” And I accurately determined they were talking about a girl.

On Monday and Tuesday, I watched as Jeff patrolled the lobby of HAL looking for this mystery target. He looked absolutely ridiculous…and even more so once I found out that he didn’t even know this girl…he just thinks she’s pretty. As you can imagine, I was very confused at this point. Several of my girlfriends were offended, saying that he was just being a typical shallow guy.

I was inclined to agree, until talking with Jeff later this week. He’s planning to ask this girl out on a date. Yes, he picked her because she’s pretty and hopes to find that there is more to her than that. “You know, it would definitely be annoying if I went through all this and found out she’s not that into Jesus.”

Then, slowly, the rationale for this absurdity became clear. Jeff’s going to ask this girl out in an effort to get to know her. He’s not particularly attached to her, making the threat of rejection less powerful. He chose a ridiculously pretty one for (in my opinion) two reasons: (1) he (like all guys) is visually stimulated and wouldn’t pick a girl he didn’t find attractive, and (2) he’s testing the waters to see just what he can get.

Ultimately, Jeff wants to be a man. He’s tired of living in fear, not taking risks, and always wondering what might have been. He doesn’t want to regret not taking every opportunity. By asking out “pretty random girl,” he’s proving to himself that he can put himself out there and be the assertive man of God that he is called to be. He said, “We’re not supposed to play it safe. We’re supposed to take risks and learn what it means to depend on God alone. It’s what we were made for. I don’t want a safe, easy life.”

So, in conclusion, I think there are other ways for Jeff to practice being a man. This whole “test” seems pretty stupid to me. I’m not sure he even knows this girl, and from what I know of her, I don’t think she’s the kind of wife that he’s trying to get. Yet I also don’t see much harm in it, as one of two things will happen. First, he may learn that she does have a steadfast faith and similar calling and they spend the rest of their lives together. Or, he spends time with her, realizes she’s none of the things he’s looking for, and that’s the end of it. He’s not emotionally invested in this – which, as an aside, is an incredibly refreshing state of mind because it’s so different from the typical GCC first date in which the whole relationship has already been decided by the time the date actually happens…but I digress.

In short, as silly as the whole thing sounds, the fact that Jeff is “practicing” being a man really impressed me. I don’t know how it turned out, or if he’s even asked her yet, and I probably won’t report it on this blog either way. The point it not to gossip about his personal life. However, I do want to say that I hope she at least agrees to go out on the date. Do I think this is the start of a great relationship? Probably not. Still, I hope she says yes when he takes this risk, so that he’s willing to do it again in the future. Maybe it will even encourage his friends to try it, too.

So, to all the “random pretty girls” out there, please say yes if a Jeff asks you out. It’s just one date, not a life-long commitment.

This morning, while walking back from the gym, Lacey and I heard the church bells downtown playing this hymn. As I reflected on events from yesterday, I couldn’t help but rejoice in God’s love and goodness.

From the door of an orphanage to the house of a king,
No longer an outcast, a new song I sing;
From rags unto riches, from the weak to the strong,
I’m not worthy to be here, but Praise God! I belong!

I’m so glad I’m a part of the family of God
I’ve been washed in the fountain, cleansed by His blood!
Joint heirs with Jesus as we travel this sod,
For I’m part of the family, the family of God.

I think the greatest thing about this family is the common bond that we have. The love of Christ joins us in a way that nothing else can. Let’s compare it to the bond that we have with our fellow Americans. When travelling overseas, I often chat briefly with other Americans abroad. But the conversation is often stilted and awkward and ends when we realize we have very little to talk about.

Not so with my Christian brothers and sisters. The bond we have comes from the fact that the Spirit of the Living God is in each of us. Our sins have been nailed to the cross – together – and we have been called children of the Most High and coheirs with Christ. We are bound to each other not just in this life, but for all eternity.

That is why two strangers can meet at a professional baseball game and end up walking the streets of an unfamiliar city, enjoying meaningful conversation about the passions of their hearts. About salvation, about Africa, about bringing hope to the world, about calling, about living a life that really matters. No moments of uncomfortable silence. Just two hearts in complete accord about what is important. A beautiful thing.

And I remembered why someday I simply must return to Africa: because that’s where I left my heart.

They’re expensive and highly emotionally charged. Lately, they are all I kind think about.

It seems that everybody is getting married this summer. I graduate May 17, head to Taiwan from June 26 to July 22, and then move to Williamsburg sometime after August 9. Why after August 9? Because that’s the date of the final wedding of the summer.

I looked at the calendar today and found that of the weekends this summer that I will be in the country, I will attend a wedding on every one except May 23. On two of those weekends I was forced to decide between two different friends. That made for some awkward moments. Four days after I get back from Taiwan I’m a bridesmaid in my roommate’s wedding (which makes me pray every night that I don’t get another nasty spider bite this year).

Despite how this post might sound, I am excited about it. I have known these couples for years and love them all and I’m so happy for them. But, at the same time, I’ve had it with hearing about dresses and cake and photography packages.

It makes me wonder. We spend months preparing for a wedding, but how much time do we devote to preparing for a marriage?

From what I’ve seen lately, not much at all.

I had a blog once before about three years ago. I can’t believe it was really three years ago, but that’s what the calendar’s telling me. I’d like to think I’m a lot wiser now than I was then and that this blog will be actually worth your time and mine, but I make no guarantees. The reality is something pretty close to the words of the Jars of Clay song that I borrowed for my blog’s title:

Confused enough to know direction
The sun eclipsed enough to shine
Be still enough to finally tremble
And see enough to know I’m blind
And see enough to know I’m blind.

So check back every once in a while. I’ll let you know what I’m learning, and maybe you can teach me something too.